Two in a day
Two in a day huh?
Must be inspired.
I am not sad, for the first time in maybe months I am happy just because I am.
For so long I had bee faking my smile, passing day by day, just surviving, looking forward to dumb things in order to keep going. Attaching myself to people or situations in order to motivate me. I had lost something so precious to me that I couldn't see another way. I found myself wanting to undo what had been done but knowing that it was for the better. Keeping the memories close, hurting, why? Because I thought I could handle it. I couldn't, but now I can. Was it the time? Was it the situations? Was it me? I do not know. But now I'm happy again, I'm starting to be me again. It still hurts sometimes, but it is not an existential pain, a pain that goes deep into your soul and mind that makes you question the decisions that you've made. It's more of a longing pain, a bittersweet memory. A nostalgic thought filled with emotions of happiness that punches you and knocks you down hard into memory lane, but it's only that, a punch, that I can take.
And honestly, who doesn't have bittersweet memories? Of course I miss those emotions, they were happy moments, filled with joy and laughter, of course, it's saddening not being there right now... but I have come to believe everything was for a reason and the best is yet to come.
I have to be prepared for that.
The best is yet to come.
A lot has happened.
I no longer live daily.
I now live freely.
I was darkened.
I have to shine brighter now, show life, show the people I love what I'm capable of.
Thank you for everything.
And you, welcome back, you who helped me through hard times, I am truly grateful. I only wish I can do the same now that you're in this state. I know you, I've been where you are. I hope you're not faking that smile...
Must be inspired.
I am not sad, for the first time in maybe months I am happy just because I am.
For so long I had bee faking my smile, passing day by day, just surviving, looking forward to dumb things in order to keep going. Attaching myself to people or situations in order to motivate me. I had lost something so precious to me that I couldn't see another way. I found myself wanting to undo what had been done but knowing that it was for the better. Keeping the memories close, hurting, why? Because I thought I could handle it. I couldn't, but now I can. Was it the time? Was it the situations? Was it me? I do not know. But now I'm happy again, I'm starting to be me again. It still hurts sometimes, but it is not an existential pain, a pain that goes deep into your soul and mind that makes you question the decisions that you've made. It's more of a longing pain, a bittersweet memory. A nostalgic thought filled with emotions of happiness that punches you and knocks you down hard into memory lane, but it's only that, a punch, that I can take.
And honestly, who doesn't have bittersweet memories? Of course I miss those emotions, they were happy moments, filled with joy and laughter, of course, it's saddening not being there right now... but I have come to believe everything was for a reason and the best is yet to come.
I have to be prepared for that.
The best is yet to come.
A lot has happened.
I no longer live daily.
I now live freely.
I was darkened.
I have to shine brighter now, show life, show the people I love what I'm capable of.
Thank you for everything.
And you, welcome back, you who helped me through hard times, I am truly grateful. I only wish I can do the same now that you're in this state. I know you, I've been where you are. I hope you're not faking that smile...
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